Twin Peaks musings/It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia musings

Twin Peaks--the whole premise is about HOW many people that died? One.

One high school student is murdered and the whole town goes apeshit. In the first episode alone, you have the parents of the victim going thru the process of finding out, and it's absolutely heartbreaking. The music is the most beautiful thing imaginable, too--Badalamenti is a genius, and him and Lynch together are a great combination.

The show didn't need a body count. One death is enough, if you treat life on film with the same fragility that comprises it. That shit is real! Now that I have daughters, it just makes me bawl my eyes out even more.

Resident Evil 6 review

Allow me to begin this review by stating, simply, that Resident Evil 6 ruulz. Now let me explain my perspective:

Long-term, I'm a big fan of the series, and have played to completion almost all the games released with the name Resident Evil slapped on them.

But there have been crappy RE titles released in the past, so let me clarify: I'm a big fan of the canon titles in the series--the ones that have a lot of work put into them. RE 1-6, basically.

Tim and Eric Cool

Tim and Eric are amazing. Awesome Show was ahead of its time.

However, many people I interact with, at work, school, and in my focus groups, hate it; don't get it; all of them morons.

Now, I KNOW everyone enjoys Patton Oswalt's and Zach Galifianakis's and Maria Bamford's standup--how can you like any of them, w/o liking Tim and Eric?

They've all guest-starred on the show. Patton namedropped them during a recorded live performance. Maria Bamford is right the heck up their alley, what with her surreality and how her voices come from another place. And Zach, the most heavy contributor to T&E material of the three, with several recurring characters he created, made this with them:


Is that not the best television parody you've ever seen, complete with Carl Winslow? I think no.

The Walking Dead, season 2 (halfway thru review)

Okay, I have a few observations about The Walking Dead, season 2.

The Stones of Barenziah

Alright, I joined the Thieves Guild, but only because I had five of those "Unusual Gem"s in my inventory, and I wanted to get rid of them.

Now I find that they're "Stones of Barenziah" or whatever, and that there's 25 of them, and I CAN'T TAKE THEM OUT OF MY INVENTORY UNTIL I FIND ALL 25.

In Defense of RE5 and RDR

Red Dead Redemption may hate women, and Resident Evil 5 may hate blacks, but I still played the shit out of both those games, cause they're AWESOME.

Video game prejudices and Cracked.com kicking ass

Cracked.com have blown my mind with a couple true-to-home truth bombs concerning prejudice in video games.

My world will never be the same.

Breaking Bad ssn 4 on Netflix instant

That is all I'm saying.

Fallout: New Vegas: The Divide

Ulysses. He's the courier for The Courier to look up to. The Courier's elder.

Okay, here's what I know about him so far--he knows everything, he knows me, he sees through me, he wants to kill me, he doesn't want to kill me, he'll let the world kill me, and everything he says has to do with walking and roads and history, and he sounds like he's a chain-smoking death metal vocalist who's permanently pissed.

This pussy stays hidden and talks through an eyebot, which he despises.
When I find him I'm gonna punch him.

Oh, by the way--I'm finally playing Lonesome Road, the fourth and final DLC Bethesda launched for the title. This is the third time I've been to The Divide. The first time, my save file had gotten too large--the whole game beaten, plus the first three DLCs beaten and fully explored.

On Hardcore Mode. It was awesome.

The first time I ventured into The Divide ...

Overhappy Girlfriend Meme

I'm sorry, models who posed for this ad.

Fallout: New Vegas Lag Woes

That's not my reflection, lusting after my game character. Creep alert!

Ever since my brother introduced me to Fallout 3 two years ago, I've been obsessed. Still haven't played 1 or 2, but I almost I feel that I know the characters.

Last week, I finally downloaded the fourth and final DLC for Fallout: New Vegas, Lonesome Road. It's been out for a good while, but with school and two kids, time to play video games, and spending money, is at a premium.

I was disappointed almost as soon as I wandered past the Canyon Wreckage and onto the lonesome road, when the game continued to lag and freeze on me. The lagging, the freezing, the not being able to aim, walk, access the Pip-Boy, pick shit up, open doors...

I did some research. Found a page containing a sort of interview/chat between gamers and an Obsidian programmer. He said that the bigger your save file gets, the more the game lags. After it reaches 10 mb, it starts getting serious. No memory cache-clearing or save file restoration thing will work, because it's INHERENT IN THE GAME ENGINE. The more shit you discover, the more the game has to load in all that data, and the less the game can concentrate on being smooth.

And I can't find the gosh darn article from last night, but I did find this, an article from 1up.com, which basically summarizes the problem I'm attempting to describe in the first few grafs.

All images by me. With my camera. All right?

So basically, the only thing you can do to stop the lag is start the game over, not do so much shit, and go back in.

So that's what I did. I'm fucking waiting to do Lonesome Road until my brand new character reaches level 25 or thereabouts. Fucking aggravating. It'll be my third time playing through the game. I thought I was almost done with my second.

Oh well. Some may say I should have done my research before even buying New Vegas at all. But nothing could have kept me from that baby. All I'm saying is Bethesda/Obsidian had better use a different game engine to make Fallout 4.

Yes my character's name beats yours any day of the week.

I hear Skyrim is lagging the fuck out too? Damn, that's a shame, especially because I'm going to have to buy it even before I play it. Damn you, Bethesda/Obsidian. You make such beautiful, vast, sweetly-made games, that LAG SO GODDAM MUCH.

You bring us to heaven and then you make it shitty! YOU MAKE OUR DREAMS AND THEN CAUSE THEM TO SHIT ON US!

I'm sorry, I'm nitpicking, and making a big deal out of one thing. But it is a big thing. It made the $10 I spent on LR a purchase to be gained over time, not immediately, in my particular case. From a certain point of view, it makes my money worthless. And that's not a smart move to pull.

I mean, some warning could have accompanied the games. Something like, "When save files reach <10MB they lag, be careful." Simple and easy. Right? You could have put it in the instruction manual.

Ol' Aphro and J-Graham sneakin' the streets of Zion

This problem, for mostly PS3 users, makes what could be the sweetest game experience a lot of us gamers have ever had, which is indeed a compliment and testament to your sweet game-making skillz, B/O, become a frustrating waste of time, money and resources.

Take the necessary months. Fix the problems. Re-release the games. ... wait, you'd be wasting money that way. Find a way to do it cheaply! You have to make it happen, B/O! And take back our old copies in trade. That's an order.

How can I order y'all around. You rule my face. Thank you for the good games. I'm not gonna stop playing them, after all.

Star Trek: Voyager, "Dark Frontier" (p1)

Janeway asking Paris to explain Fort Knox, standing in her conference room with all higher officers seated at the table, with her hands trailing on the backs of chairs, all smiles ... she's diplomatic, beautiful, tantalizing, intelligent, powerful, and I want to bone her so sensually.

And 7 of 9! WHEW! Hotness epitomized (not to say that skinny chicks exclusively are hot). This episode, they lost the blue suit, with dark blue on the torso and legs and light blue sleeves. It looked pretty good on her, but this time they've got her in sparkly dark pink! They always make her tits really huge too. It's gotta be a part of the suit itself. No woman of her size can be truly shaped that way.

The storyline, as usual, is wonderful. 7 of 9 finding notes from her parents before they were assimilated. Flashbacks to her childhood, playing with a model Borg cube.

My kids once again interrupted my tv watching, so I couldn't finish the episode. Fucking kids and their diapers and their can't-support-themselves-ness. I'VE GOT STAR TREK TO WATCH!